A Day of Company

There’s milk on the sheets, on the floor, on my rob, and all over Owen’s blankets no matter how many fresh ones I change throughout the day. There is milk literally everywhere. This morning I woke up with half of Owen’s head soaked in milk.

Owen was a bit fussy last night and demanded constant nursing instead of going to sleep as he had done previous nights this week. I held and nurses him for hours while propping myself up in bed with pillows. It was once again infuriating to watch Peter sleep so soundly next to us in total oblivion.

To be able to spend so much time together as a family is both a blessing and a curse. It’s well known that marital satisfaction is at an all time low during newborn phase. Spousal hatred is real! There is no time to hold hands or snuggle. There is no patience for please and thank you. Of the nine things my husband does right, I never fail to notice one thing he missed. Nothing he does is fast enough, good enough, or thoughtful enough. Why can’t he just anticipate my needs? Most of them are pretty obvious. Every sentence is either a command or critique, yet I wonder where the romance went in our marriage? On top of all that, there is the pressure to be everything to your spouse. Not only does he need to take care of things around the apartment, change diapers and keep a constant glass of water by myself, he also needs to be charming, attractive, eloquent and thought provoking. Unsurprisingly, neither one of us fits the bill. When tension runs high, one quick solution is to go see other people for company.

Fortunately our couple friends (B&D) with a seven-month old boy invited us over for homemade India food. D’s mom is visiting from India and spoiled us all with piles of fresh dosas and chutney. This was our first social outing with Owen. I was a bit nervous at first but Owen was on his absolute best behavior the entire time from 2 to 6pm. There was no crying in the car or during the two diaper changes we did on the living room floor. He normally despises diaper changes and cold wipes. To watching him laying there fully alert and quite while I talked him through the diaper changes felt nothing short of performing small miracles. I held and nursed him most of the time. When the 7-mos old baby came to play after his nap, we put Owen down for some tummy time. Once again, no fuss. He stayed on the floor for quite a while kicking his little legs and lifting up his head. Owen did not one, but three head turns in a roll! Everyone cheered him on in excitement. All the activity tired him out and prepared us for a sleepy ride home. The rain came down as we left B&D’s house. It felt good and content. Despite a rough start and all the marital dissatisfactions, life is still pretty sweet, even more so with our baby Owen on board.

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